Preface
Everything is tone. What is extreme bad taste with one tone counts as trenchant social commentary with another. Now, I am a big and important Man, a broker, a hitter, a pork snouts market maker in every sense. I am what they call a Player. I can't be bothered with girly crap like tone. So I am simply going to tell you, as the author and therefore as a matter of fact, that this is trenchant social commentary. It is now your responsibility to have a fitting tone. And if you use a tone of extreme bad taste, you can be sure we will all think less of you and your disgusting sense of humor.
The Female Body Parts Exchange
Buy, Sell, TradeThe World's First Commodities Exchange Dealing Wholly in the World's Favorite Commodity
Due to unanticipated demand, no new accounts are being accepted at this time. Please try again in a month or so.This site is a real live financial trading game. Registered investors attain profit by trading female body parts and financial instruments tied to female body parts. The winner is determined quarterly, by determining the player whose account has the highest net asset value in the free market. Winners get a one-year subscription to Ms. magazine provided they also purchase $300 worth of luggage they don't need. Daily market values are a function of price-momentum, market liquidity, and whether Alan Greenspan dressed for rain today, each factor to be weighted in sign (+ or -) and magnitude randomly in order to most accurately match real market behavior. Good luck, and God Bless America.
Stock
Due to a large volume of "that's not funny, that's sick" comments, this site has been suspended until Your Firm determines a course to make it be both sick AND funny. Thank you for your patience, Your Firm.Ask about our special bulk discounts on purchases of 10 or more of one part type.
Speciality Items
Note: the collector's market is volatile and investments in this category
should be regarded as speculative. Items will be held in account unless
otherwise instructed; deliveries shipped refrigerated at account holder's
expense. Quantities are limited.
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